Text says,‘Ellen’s Hair-Dog criticized that she plucked too much eyebrow!’ Chicken man says, “Chickens are plucked, eyebrows are tweezed!” Acrylic on oil? on ‘Highlite Canvoboard’, 16″X12″ This was piggyback on a very old portrait and the ‘Canvoboard’ is closer to cardboard than canvasboard. The corners and edges were kind of frayed which I reinforced with gobs of acrylic paint.
To bid on this one go HERE..

Well, Mrs. Breen says this one doesn’t make any sense, as if that has ever been a concern! I was working on a big, ponderous, unwieldy captain portrait when I decided to take a break, so I assaulted this little head. First, I wasn’t sure what the subject’s sex was, it was a kind of “What’s that? It’s Pat!” moment, but the clues were right there. Hair that was just a tad too long for a guy in that era and pencil thin eyebrows. The eyebrows, especially, told the tale to me. I also noted that her hair looked like a Cockerspaniel, so I turned her hair into a hair-dog!

Now one of my pet peeves is the over-tweezing of eyebrows, and Mrs. Breen is under strict instructions to leave hers as bushy as female codes allow. Whenever I see an over-plucked lady I just get visions of Lucille Ball in her last years, Shaky crayon loops drawn over the hideous scars where her eyebrows used to lie! Don’t do it ladies! Of course, this advice is coming from the incredibly attractive toothless mouth of yours truly, pictured in the entry just below.

A couple of years ago I had to endure a my wife’s 25th prep school reunion, sitting at an outcast table with some dweeby angst-ridden former school mates who, harboring resentments against childhood slights, came to exorsise their demons. I was somehow drafted into the role of therapist, not a good role for me. Mrs. Breen was horrified when I got drunk with them, encouraging them to burn the ribbons anchoring the helium balloon bouquets to the banquet table with my lighter, crazy laughing as they rose into dark rafters. The cool kids tried to fit back into their teenage roles, but now old and fat, could only glare at the dweebs for their impertinence. “You have no power anymore! GO, before someone drops a house on you too!”

People at our table told me about a teacher named Squirrel Norris, who had the bushiest, untamed, wandering eyebrow hairs on the planet. This was a great gift, and I see him in my mind all the time. I never went to that school or met the man, but he’s moved right into my imagination, third door on the left.

When Ellen looks in the mirror here, she sees Squirrely’s brow, even though hers has been tweezed to a single-file follicle march. The hand holding the tweezers is backwards(not to mention crude, well, I guess both hands are crude)but I just left it. I also made a diagram showing the proper eyebrow alignment to eye in case you were wondering. Ellen really looks like she’s wondering, “what the hell am I doing in this painting?” Overall, a wistful mess of a breen! Yikes!

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  1. Gee, that looks like it could have turned into a tribute to character actor Vincent Schiapareli:

  2. Anonymous

     /  February 22, 2006

    This is great!
    I’ve had your site bookmarked for quite some time now. I love to see what you have done and I must say I LOVE LOVE LOVE this one and how you’ve turned her hair into a raging doggy. LOL Too good!

  3. Anonymous

     /  March 12, 2008

    Moar breen!

  4. Anonymous

     /  June 2, 2008



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